Carolyn Hax: I don’t wish to be my biological father’s dirty little secret

Adjusted from a current discussion that is online.

At the ripe age that is old of, i will be both excited and very happy to have discovered my biological dad through DNA evaluation. He abandoned my mother and me personally fleetingly when I was created therefore I do not have illusions in regards to the past. But i do want to become familiar with him and my half-sister. He has got provided his medical history beside me, that I really appreciate.

Other than my mom, everyone else during my household, even my adoptive daddy, is very supportive of me developing a relationship she doesn’t want to stand in my way with him, and even my mom says. My bio-father and we email daily and share tales of y our life. He could be apologetic by what he did, reassuring I found him, etc that he is happy.

My only concern is the fact that he does not want to inform their spouse about my presence. They have been both in their mid-60s as well as in a healthy body and might live a lot more years — for enough time to see my young ones have actually young ones. I do not be prepared to be instantly (or ever) invited in to the fold of these household.

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